About eroticnoire

I'm a poet, writer and lover of all things sensual, erotic and alluring. I believe that the biggest erogenous zone in the body is the mind. It's with words you can soft suck on a person's imagination, give butterfly kisses to their curiosity, long lick their thoughts and use the tongue of your creativity and slide it into the wetness of anticipation.

How to have a 3some but without having a third person

I’m pretty sure that one or both partners in most relationships today have thought or spoken about having a threesome. However, the idea of bringing in a third person, finding them, setting up boundaries, creating reassurances etc can be overwhelming. 

So here’s a way to explore the pleasures and sensations of having a third person without actually having anyone else – toys!

Let me explain – if a woman would like to experience MMF (male, male, female) combination of a threesome then something like the curved 7.5inch dong is perfect. It’s a dildo with a suction cup that can be stuck to any flat surface. So, for example it can be stuck to the floor so she can ride it while giving oral to her partner. Alternatively it can be stuck to the wall while she pushes back on it. 

For the man the Satisfyer Men Pleasure Stroker Masturbator is that is needed. His partner can ride is face while using the toy on his penis. It’ll give the sensation of experiencing two women at the same time. Another alternative is for the woman to hold the toy next to her yoni so that he can alternate his strokes between being inside her and the toy. 

There are plenty of creative and kinky ways these toys can be used to recreate the sensations of having a third person in on that action. Yes, some aspects and dimensions won’t happen being touched and stroked but multiple hands but, it’s a great starting point. 

Give it a go and let us know how you get on.

Kinks vs Fetishes – what’s the difference?

As more and more people exploring their sexual side kinks and fetishes are an area that comes up. However, the understanding of what they are leaves some confused. Here’s the Eroticnoire 101 of kinks vs fetish

Kink: Something that arouses you and is usually considered outside the ‘norm’ or unconventional. Kinks tend to be around exploration, discovery, pushing boundaries and an addition enhances the sexual experience. 

Fetish: This is a sexual act, object, aeasthetic, behaviour, characteristic or body part that is necessary for a person to become aroused or a part of sex. They tend to very specific and until they are satisfied won’t result in sexual pleasure, an example being feet play. 

There is a danger with fetishes as some can be based on race or inappropriate and non consensual acts such as peeping. 

It should be pointed out that BDSM is an area of sexual pleasure that can cause a lot of confusion as an aspect of BDSM can be a kink for one person and a fetish for another – example spanking or choking. They often overlap and form a grey area. A way to differentiate the two is when a kink becomes the primary source of sexual pleasure, then it’s a fetish. 

Edging what is it and are the benefits

Edging – What is it?
It’s the sexual technique of repeatedly building up to an orgasm and delaying the release each time. While for the most part orgasm is the end goal of sex preventing release might seem counter intuitive.

Why do it?
But here’s five reasons to edge
Can intensify the actual orgasm
Improve stamina
Aid in prolonging sex
Can help achieve multiple orgasms

How’s it done
Gradually stimulate yourself or partner to just below the point of orgasm eg if the point of orgasm is 9 out of 10 stop at 7 or 8.
Once you’ve got to that point pause or stop stimulation until you feel the sensation subside
Take deep breaths during this time
Once sensation has subsided, it starts to gradually build up again to that point just below orgasm

Tip
You can edge for as many times or long as you like. Some people do it for days or even weeks.

Eroticnoire Bookclub – Bell Hooks: Salvation

Written from both historical and cultural perspectives, Salvation takes an incisive look at the transformative power of love in the lives of African Americans. Whether talking about the legacy of slavery, relationships and marriage in Black life, the prose and poetry of Martin Luther King, Jr., James Baldwin, and Maya Angelou, the liberation movements of the 1950s, 60s, and 70s, or hip hop and gangsta rap culture, hooks lets us know what love’s got to do with it.

Combining the passionate politics of W.E.B. DuBois with fresh, contemporary insights, hooks brilliantly offers new visions that will heal our nation’s wounds from a culture of lovelessness. Her writings on love and its impact on race, class, family, history, and popular culture raise all the relevant issues. This is work that helps us heal. Salvation shows us how to create beloved American communities.

Wifey material mentality and the dangers

My thoughts on ‘wifey material’ and its danger.

I’ll let the blog do your thoughts but would love to hear your thoughts, experience and questions if you’ve got any. Let’s talk.

  • With the ‘wifey material’ mentality nobody wins.

Not the ‘sexual’ women, not the ‘wifey material’ women, not even the man.

  • Men (and society) are conditioned to believe women who own their sexual agency are not ‘wifey’ material. These women are not seen as modest. They don’t attach shame, guilt or hide their sensuality and as a result are not respected, valued or deemed worthy.
  • Women who uphold the status of being ‘modest’ or don’t express or hide their sexual agency are seen as ‘wifey’ material. They save themselves for their future husband/a good man and uphold the modesty status as a badge of honour and virtue and generally viewed as ‘good girls’, domesticated, home-makers etc.
  • The issue: sexually liberated women excite most men – but also scare them too. Men will sleep with them, lust after and desire them – even love them. However, they are seen as tainted, impure, unworthy of the status of ‘wifey’.
  • ‘wifey material’ women are unable to excite these same men as a sexually liberated women does. These men struggle with being able to simultaneously love, respect and sexually desire their ‘wifey material’ woman the same way they do a sexual liberated woman. It’s basically either or. And in some case these men then (some, not all) cheat on their wives with same sexually liberated women.
  • Sexually liberated women (who wish to be a wife and very much deserving of marriage), are ‘left on the shelf’ or ‘for the streets’ and boxed into the dimensions of not being suitable wife. They are not even given basic respect, love, value the deserve. They are viewed as sexual object and objectified rather than as a person.
  • These men who marry a ‘wifey material’ woman are then ‘trapped’ in a relationship, marriage, situationship because they’ve been told the sexually liberated women is undesirable. They are unable to see their wife in any sexual way as they associate it with being a whore.
  • Bottom line is – nobody wins. We all need to recognise, unlearn, challenge and deconstruct this ‘wifey material’ mentally. This is not all men, it’s not all women but it is an issue for all sides.   

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5 toys to spice up Valentine’s Day

With valentine’s just around the corner there is no better time to consider buying a new adult toy. At RedRoomPleasures.com we’ve picked out five top toys that’ll have you and your lover tingling with pleasure

  1. Satisfyer Pro 2 Next Generation Clitoral Massager

The Satisfyer Pro 2 is one of the top 10 toys on the market. This clitoral stimulator will vibration will take you to orgasm heaven. It’s been dubbed the squirt maker. The soul snatcher. But it’s never been called underwhelming. It’s fully waterproof so you can really get wet and wild with it. Buy Now

  1. Satisfyer App Enabled Sexy Secret Panty Vibrator Wine Red

The Satisfyer panty vibrator is a discreet beauty can be worn in public and controlled by a mobile app. It’s perfect if you want to get naughty in public and see how far you can push your boundaries. It’s whisper quiet so it can’t be heard. It can even be controlled from the other side of the world via wifi. Perfect if there’s distance between you both.
Buy Now

  1. Satisfyer Partner Couples Vibrator

This Satisfyer Partner Couples Vibrator toy offers simultaneous pleasure for both partners during sex. It gives clitoral and g-spot stimulation as well as vibration of the man’s penis – it’s win-win. Buy Now

  1. Satisfyer App Enabled Curvy 2 Plus Clitoral Massager Pink

The Satisfyer Curvy 2 Plus is the upgrade of the satisfyer pro 2 with the added benefit of being controlled by an app. Great if you want to explore control and submission in a playful, sexy way. Buy Now

  1. Satisfyer Men Pleasure Stroker Masturbator

The Satisfyer Men Pleasure Stroker Masturbator toy flips the focus of pleasure onto the man. Great to use on him or have him put on a show. This toy combines the sensation of oral and vaginal penetration into one. Buy Now

Chronicles – the new book from Mr Eroticnoire

Chronicles by Mr Eroticnoire

Calling all book lovers. This new book includes 16 stories based in London. Perfect to enjoy with a partner, as a gift or for those alone times. Available on Amazon.com and Amazon.co.uk  – search ‘Eric Noire’

Eroticnoire bookclub: Pussy Prayer: by black girl bliss

Pussy Prayers is about rekindling the connection to your pleasure center – the space through which you manifest worlds – regardless of the body parts you do or don’t have. These pages speak to the unique sexual experiences of Black women and femmes in order to help them heal from trauma and miseducation while learning how to powerfully conjure up a life that is dripping with sweetness – all by getting in touch with the one part of yourself that was divinely designed for pleasure. Here, you’ll find stories, sister-girl-talk, and practical, easy-to-do rituals to begin your personal journey of understanding the importance of pleasure, its connection to manifestation, and ways to increase your personal power so you can enjoy #EverydayDeliciousness.