We all have our ‘base’ type of sexual energy but with all energy it is in a constant state of flux, it’s fluid. It’s important to not only know one’s own energy but to explore it, expand it and most of all be comfortable in it. Equally important is our ability to express and communicate it to others – without shame or hesitation.
Below are five types of sexual energies which will hopefully help you get to know and understand yours (or your partner’s)
Energetic: Anticipation/tease/connection – if this is you then you’ll be aroused and attracted to people and things that dangle that sexual carrot in front of you. You like suggestion, hints and subtle innuendo. You’ll see sexual things in what would, to others, be simple, plain and non-sexual just as much as those things that are.
Sensual: Relaxation/igniting the body through the senses – For you it’s being at ease that can arouse you as well as having your five senses stimulated. Foods, smells, taste of things can get you going. Like energetic you can be aroused by things which aren’t normally associated with sex eg. the taste of a certain fruit or hearing a particular sound eg heels walking over concrete.
Sexual: Penetration/nudity/genitals – most people think that we all operate in this type of energy plane but it’s not necessarily true. For this type of person they can be turned on simply but going for the goal – no warm up, no warning. The act, the idea, the sensation of penetration gets them going.
Kinky: Taboo/power play/naughty – For this person they’re aroused by things which ‘shouldn’t be done’ or not generally accepted/considered ‘normal’. This person general associates themselves with being into BDSM, various fetishes and the like. The advent of a certain book that became a film has many think this is the new default and ultimate energy level – this is not the case. This person thrives, loves and needs this be in this state.
Transcendent: Meditative/spiritual – This person becomes aroused through and when they reach that ‘higher’ state or vibration. This person could be considered to be the meditative type as they’re most aroused when they’re connected to a similar person and energy. For some who have this type of energy the physicality of sex isn’t always necessary. Things like tantic sex and sensual massages can offer them highly intense orgasms and satisfaction.
N.B. Don’t worry if you don’t know yours or you feel you’re a mix. We are educated then bombarded with stereotypes, social norms, cultural behaviors and religious principles that limit ourselves or have us think we can only be one type. Energy is fluid, it’s constant in its presence. You can’t stop it or get rid of it – it just is. Explore yours (alone or with a partner), study it, celebrate it and of course ‘practice’ it.